Adults that have never been offered or experienced therapy during their childhood, will often be remised to extend it to their own children. This is common in African American communities. African Americans have a history for being some of the most resilient people in the world. Historically, they have used spirituality or avoidance to handle trauma and other mental health concerns. Consider your own experiences when therapy could have possibly helped you get through a traumatic event, difficult time or provided you with a safe place to talk, but instead you prayed about it, wished about it or avoided it all together.
In addition to the spiritual foundation and strong family ties, most often prioritized and utilized in African American families, therapy is a great tool to add. This includes individual, group and family sessions. African Americans parents, like other cultures, should seek therapy for their children during loss/death of a loved one, divorce, or other family transitions. Other significant life events such as recently learning of or suspected abuse, incidents of bullying or observed changes in behaviors or moods, should prompt a parent to seek professional help. Think about how different your life would be if you had attended therapy during your childhood.
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“The experiences of the African American child are like none other in the United States,” said LaVome Robinson, a clinical psychologist and professor of psychology at DePaul University in Chicago who has studied suicidality in Black adolescents.
-The New York Times Sept. 10, 2021
It is common to hear in the African American community comments such as Black people don’t go to therapy, Black people don’t commit suicide, All he/she need is some good ole discipline, What happens in our house stays in our house. These comments have been repeated from generation to generation. But these comments are far from any truth and places African American children at greater risk. The forgoing of therapy can lead to self-injurious behaviors, depression, anxiety, substance abuse, running away, and several other risk.
“I think in the past suicide — or suicidal behavior — was just thought of as a white thing,” said Dr. Sheftall, a principal investigator at the Center for Suicide Prevention and Research at the Abigail Wexner Research Institute at Nationwide Children’s Hospital in Columbus, Ohio.
-The New York Times Sept. 10, 2021
With all the strides made in the counseling profession, media attention and accessibility to services such as online access, video and texting services, many parents are still very reluctant. Your reluctance to therapy may be due to your own anxiety about what may be revealed in therapy, unfamiliarity with the process, lack of confidence in the outcome of professional treatment, or your own guilt around your parenting. A closed attitude to therapy can be quite challenging to change.
Some of the most common mental health disorders during childhood are ADHD, behavior problems, anxiety and depression. You can effectively reduce the risk and challenges your child might face and reinforce healthy mental health practices by seeking professional treatment. Make changing the narrative a family priority this year.
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Even if you think they’re slight, they are stemming from something. This could include isolative habits, like staying in their room for extended durations, not engaging in activities they once enjoyed, changes in sleeping and eating patterns, or closed communication with others. So, it’s important to be an observant parent. Be aware of changes! Make a list of noticeable changes you have observed and share with a therapist.
For years, African American families did not talk about mental health. Teach your children that good mental health is a part of a healthy life. This means that you’ll have to address your own mental and emotional health concerns. Show your children you are willing to address your issues in a professional setting. Set a good example! Make an appointment for yourself to deal with unresolved issues and challenges you are facing. Invest in your emotional wellbeing.
This involves removing people your children have expressed do not make them feel safe. Set a standard time each week for just you and your child to meet and talk freely. Stick to your scheduled time. Do not schedule anything else during that time and completely devote yourself to your child. (No cell phone zone) Be available, even if your child cancels!
Historically, many African Americans did not trust doctors, given the history of being subjected to involuntary experiments, sampling and misdiagnoses. Teach your children that regular visits to the doctor are important for their health. Be open and honest with their pediatrician and share any emotional, educational, or mental health concerns you have. Partner with your child’s doctor. Ask for referrals and specialists’ information for concerns outside the scope of the pediatrician’s practice.
When questioning if your child should see a therapist, err on the side of caution. Schedule a therapy session! If you or your child is not comfortable with the therapist, find another. Do not jeopardize your child’s mental and emotional health because the therapist was not a good match. It is not uncommon for a person to request another therapist. If you went to the beauty salon and did not like the way the stylist finished your hair, would you stop getting your hair styled? NO! You would continue until you found a stylist that met your needs. Approach your quest for a child therapist in the same way.
Some things to look for: A therapist with experience and knowledge in the areas you are seeking treatment, natural chemistry between the therapist, you and your child, availability to meet your scheduling needs and a general understanding and respect for your culture, race, religion, background, etc.
Therapy is not an opportunity for someone to place blame! It is a method to guide people on their journey. Be open minded!
If you are unsure if you should seek professional therapy for your child, decide to get started today by visiting our provider directory below.
